I think I am pretty proud of me this week. I ended up loosing a little bit over 3 pounds in week one. Which I am surprised at, I'd only thought I'd loose one or two. I like being home and eating healthy, it makes me feel like I have something to do during the day, putting a healthy meal together is like putting together a puzzle, looking at labels, cutting up fruit, and in the end the dish looks pretty. I miss eating other food a lot though, and at night I feel a little hungry. I try to console myself with the idea that I'd like to be skinny, a lot more than I'd like some chips but its hard. Especially when I do treat myself to a high calorie food I do so in a verrrrry small amount. I miss the fullness of biting into a brownie thats all gooey and warm. I miss feeling like there is enough, too much, even for me there to eat. I am scared though, that because I feel this way that it's not going to last long, that I'm going to snap and eat something bad. But I'm not just eating lettuce with no dressing, I'm had broiled fish last night with butter and pasta with goat cheese. I don't think I'm depriving myself, but just not being able to go into the kitchen and justify eating 6 or 7 cookies is hard.
When I think back to why I wasn't loosing weight in school, its easy once I realize how much I was eating. I would eat healthy for about half the day, but then be surrounded by skinny itty bitty girls eating 4 or 5 times as much as me. How is that fair? I would get so frustrated and end up eating a full sandwich with 3 tablespoons of mayo, and then have cookies later that night on dorm, and finish it off with popsicles. Yikes.
I am happy at my progress, but struggling with these new healthful changes in my life.
Goals for this weak
- Work out at least 4 times
- Cut down on fats in diet, eat more protein and carbs
- Pack good snacks for work
1 comment:
The struggle with food I think will never stop. I think it is like most people who quit smoking and get the urge often. The fact that you are conscious of your urge is the most important thing. Knowing that you have to fight it, is important. Trust me when you get more and more days under your belt you will think about it less and less. Just keep really good snacks around you at all times and eat them when you get the urge. I use mandarin oranges, bananas, pretzels, peaches, and pears – they seem to help me. I have found veggie burgers lately and they are oh so tasty as a snack (without the bun of course - but all the toppings less cheese and mayo)!!! Remember, no pounds gained is a good day! Anything more is a great day!!!
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